During nap time I have to decide between cleaning the apartment or myself, plan ahead for lunch/dinner or pack the diaper bag if I have dreams of leaving the apartment. I desperately try to fit in blogging, reading, my church calling, making doctor appointments, maintaining friendships, etc. At the end of most days, I feel like nothing "got done." Blah blah. Everyone's life has challenges.
But in moments of clarity, I realize none of that matters. I was looking through my iPhone (which yes, I am falling in love with) and found these pictures. Ready for those cliches? My babies are so beautiful they move me to tears. I look at Anton and feel like we've written a symphony. Professional cheerleaders have nothing on me when Stella tells me a train says, "Choo choo" or folds her arms to pray.
I finally get what Maurice Sendak was getting at, "Please don't go. I'll eat you up, I love you so."
I really could eat 'em up.
Stella pushes me to new limits Every. Single. Day. I call her my handful and half. But what comes with her energy and determination is the best sense of humor and intense affection. She is passionate and clever. She is a darling with Anton and now that he'll smile at her, forget it. I've been reminded by several wise people that these personality traits make successful adults.
And Anton. Sweet Anton. He is peaceful and happy. He smiles whenever his dad enters the room and is easily comforted. The gas that was burning our nostrils seems to be fading. He lets me know when he needs something, like "Um, are you going to put me down for a nap today?" but goes with the flow. The other day I found myself thinking if our next baby is like Anton, I could have it next April. (NO not an announcement).
Stay tuned. I'll try to out-do my cheesy level soon.
10 comments:
As I read this I almost started to cry. How lucky am I? Not only do I get the two munchkins, but the beautiful wife and most amazing mother to help raise my children. I truly am not deserving of all of this, am I?
I adored this post. And I adore those Gardners. I was actually just thinking yesterday that we would love to see you four and catch up, then felt a little guilty at the idea of monopolizing your time. I take the guilt back; can we make a plan to see each other?!
This is truly beautiful and you constantly amaze me with your great attitude, Erica. You guys are such a beautiful family. And yes, your kids will make terrific adults.
I think becoming a parent turns the best of us cheesy. That's why cliches are cliches, because they are common and true. But I'm glad for these feelings of euphoria because it makes the hard days a little less hard. This reminds me of poem that I love (sorry, don't know who wrote it):
"Cleaning and scrubbing can wait 'til tomorrow for babies grow up, we've learned to our sorrow. So, quiet down cobwebs. Dust go to sleep! I'm rocking my baby, and babies don't keep!"
Just like you said, don't worry about the cleaning. You will have lot's of time for a clean house when they grow up, which won't take very long at all. :)
You made a pregnant lady cry just now.
Almost to tears? I need another kneenex. Erica, the only people more cheesy than parents is, what else? Grandparents. We've earned the right to be cheesy. I love my grandkids and their parents too.
What a sweet post. I love your little family!!! Anton and Jude are a lot alike, I think:) They are both such sweet, easy-going babies! It makes me feel like raising kids isn't THAT scary after all (most days...) You are such a good mom! Love you all!
(LOVE Jasons comment too!)
oh bear, you're such a tender heart. i love how much you love the bebes. and you do a pretty great job taking care of them.
aunts are pretty cheeesy too. in fact, i talked about your babies in relief society. and i show their pictures to old people i meet in london (or anyone really) and when matt and i left for london stellie buttons was the only thing that made us tear up in the car to the airport. (anton wasn't around yet. in fact, we didn't even know anton was coming yet. good thing we may have never left)
i adore your babies. and you too.
Love this post! Those babies are the sweetest thing. I could eat them up too. Every picture of Stella makes me love her more and more. She must have some special gift of sending joy out through photos.
Best. Post. Ever.
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